


Now Being In Someone Else's Shoes

by stratskosphere4



Category: American Horror Story: Coven
Genre: Angst, F/F, Family Drama, Suggestive Themes, flashback scenes, going to hell with this one, mother daughter relationship, triggering elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-06
Updated: 2014-03-06
Packaged: 2018-01-14 17:28:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1274899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stratskosphere4/pseuds/stratskosphere4
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After scaring her husband out the door, Cordelia almost finds solace with her mother. But when Fiona says something, it does not result in her daughter's favour. Suggestive themes, careful with this one. My first AHS fic/oneshot!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Now Being In Someone Else's Shoes

**Author's Note:**

> **Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Just this fic and my twisted piece of mind too. Tried my best with this one but hey, here's another one to add to the bunch!

She still couldn't fathom how much her heart was breaking all over inside of her. Of all the beautiful, smart and kind women in the world, he had to pick some redheaded silhouette to commit the unfaithful act. Maybe he was aware of her _deeper_ secret but whatever it was still made the beautiful blonde doe-eyed witch Cordelia more incensed and aching deep down.  
  
Her tall voluptuous ailing mother Fiona wasn't complaining over her daughter giving Hank the quick wifely boot-out-the-door; she was _proud_ of her since Fiona felt indifferent and suspicious of the _Jughead_.  She had initially sensed some foreboding conspiracy reeking from the man but she still couldn't tap her finger as to what his true motives are, and what significance they're consumed with.  
  
 _Infidelity_ seemed like an ignorant and distasteful form of a significant ambition. No matter how much it repulsed the elderly Supreme, she couldn't help but to feel her heart burning uncomfortably for her stunning and bright daughter. Call it 'maternal instinct', but she was going to make sure Hank would soon find his rather untimely fate sealed.  
  
However there it was. That glint in her hazel eyes. The kind of glow that indicated how protective and _possessive_ her heart truly felt over her strong daughter. She knew that cagey man wasn't the _first_ to have obtained something of great value from where she stood.  
  
Fiona was shocked and surprised that Cordelia hadn't mentioned much of a certain incidents while she attended Miss Robichaux's Academy. She was only eleven before that time when those _routines_ ensued but for the elder, she was actually relieved that her magical offspring knew how to keep herself mum back then. She didn't even resort to her brainwashing magic back in those days either. Not when it came to her beautiful daughter.  
  
Maybe her ginger headed _unrelated_ Auntie Myrtle had found an incredible method to take Cordelia's mind _off_ those _moments_. Something that Fiona should take some comfort in knowing.  
  
Well, things are certainly a lot different nowadays.  
  
Zoning back to the present circumstances, Fiona heard Cordelia lament furthermore and she felt something that started driving her impulses a little on edge. Even while her daughter was struggling to undo the last bit of her zipper in her black satin blouse, exposing the beautiful soft fair skin underneath as well as her matching black bra. In all honesty, Fiona could give less than a damn of that piece of fabric and wouldn't be upset if it wasn't on her daughter.  
  
While fidgeting with that thick charcoal grey zipper and grunting frustrated at the growing annoyance it left behind, Fiona decided to reach out and _help_ her blind daughter out of her black blouse.  
  
"Here, let me help you with that, honey." her deep sultry voice chimed out. She gently grasped Cordelia's small forearm and her other hand went up to take the helm of the satiny black collar and started to carefully pull the garment down.  
  
Cordelia almost protested since she's a big girl and could've got her black blouse off no problem, but the idea to reassure her mother of her confidence in taking the piece of clothing off herself was quickly vapourized when suddenly she jolted before being greeted by a shocking flashback.  
  
 _/"Hold still, my pet." her mother's hand rested along the tiny belly of her youthful daughter.  
  
Oh she loathed being labeled as a **pet**_ _by her mother.  
  
Little Cordelia's hazel eyes were scrunched closed, teeth clenching tightly, her hands and wrists bound against her sides by her mother's resilient magic.  
  
Fiona looked down possessively and dominantly at her small daughter, her beautiful yet dangerous smile etched across her face.  
  
Cordelia jerked underneath her, her hands formed into firm fists. The magic she could sense was flowing through her and in the air around both her and her mother.  
  
She didn't know why this sort of **family routine** seemed absolutely necessary to her predecessor.  
  
Feeling another convulsing jolt in her nether regions, young Cordelia wanted to scream out loud but all that came out of her tiny mouth was a tired gasp. Her eyes fluttered open but quickly closed back up. They had let a small tear escape the one eye and it rolled down the soft ivory youthful cheek.  
  
Fiona glared at the weakness behind her young daughter's closed eyes, and she drew her hand back, saying along the way, "Here, let me help you with this, sweetheart." and after another second while observing her magical little girl, she backhanded Cordelia across her face.  
  
"Keep those gorgeous little eyes opened, Delia darling. Having them closed means you're showing weakness."  
  
The little blonde girl whimpered and her cheek stinging uncomfortably from the given slap. "But...M-Mommy. It hu-hurts."  
  
The tall elegant witch grinned sweetly down at her, her hand softly stroking along her daughter's slightly bruised jaw and clutches it delicately in her palm. "Shhh. Relax my sweet little Cordelia. This will be over soon." Her smile turned fiercer and wicked.  
  
Little Cordelia winced and tried to take her dear mother's words in she muttered the year before about how this **routine** is some of the finer ways to show her little daughter how mothers often express their love for them, whatever it really was her mother rambled about back then, it still left the little girl lost and confused.  
  
Honestly, as young as her mind was, Cordelia's heart knew it was wrong and criminal. She had never asked to be given such drastic and cruel treatments by her abundant and possessive mother whatsoever./_  
  
Flinching and gasping back to the present, the grown up headmistress Cordelia jumped backwards from enduring the traumatic past reminiscence. Fiona's eyes widen alarmingly and instinctively she lunged at her daughter quickly pulling the blonde woman safely back to her previous standing posture.  
  
Flailing her one arm out slightly while unconsciously wringing it out of the black blouse sleeve by her mother's firm clutch, Cordelia stepped aside from her posthaste and belted out, " _NO_ , don't!"  
  
Blinking feeling startled by her daughter's sudden outburst, the elderly Supreme raised an eyebrow. Concerned and confused, Fiona asks her, "Oh goodness, Delia dear. What's wrong, honey?"  
  
Fiercely tugging her shirt sleeve back and defensively folding her blouse over her, and then clumsily zipping it back up, the young witch couldn't stop playing back that tumultuous flashback of her youth. Feeling her cane still grasped tightly in her one hand, Cordelia raised it up and after she managed to redo the last bit of her zipper in her shirt, she aimed the narrow flat tip of her cane suspiciously pointing it at her mother but due to her blindness, the end was unintentionally pointing to the bedroom door panel instead.  
  
"Don't you _dare_ come any closer, _Fiona_." She hissed warningly.  
  
Puzzled and alarmed by her successor's defensive words, Fiona couldn't stop mentally scratching her head as to what seems to be bothering her daughter that has elicited a lot of anger towards her. Cordelia was shaking visibly as well as violently and it brought her mother's concern level even higher.  
  
"Delia darling, try to settle down." her mother tried consoling her.  
  
Shaking her head and deliberately disregarding her mother's words, the blonde woman could easily tell which direction her mother's voice was coming from and glared furiously in that space. "Don't tell me to settle down, Fiona. I saw what you did!"  
  
Still stunned and bewildered yet holding some inkling of worry that Cordelia might be retreating from her for those _past reasons_ Fiona felt some of that notion unconsciously move her over and being careful she also chides, "Delia, don't hurt yourself. It's going to be okay, dear." then she takes her daughter's wavering cane, struggles a little with her but gently relinquishes it from Cordelia's tight grasps, then she sets it down on the black wicker chair as well as hearing her daughter whimper softly while staggering backwards some more.  
  
"Give me my cane back, Fiona!" she protested wildly.  
  
Oh, what she would do to go back those days where her beautiful daughter used to call her _Mom_ or _Mommy_ or _Mother_ even with any resentment hidden underneath her tone of voice. She would take just about any god damn thing to be called a _Mom_ again.  
  
Fiona shook her head, still worried and bothered by her daughter's sudden change of behaviour. Warily stepping closer to her young successor, she asks her again with a calmer tone in her voice, "Cordelia, what else is it you've assumed I've done to you?"  
  
Frankly there are a series of cold things she has done to her daughter that Cordelia still remembers clearly. Abandoning her and then putting all of her malicious mental abuse in her and making her daughter feel weak and inept to handle the academy on her own along with a lot of disregard and rejection she's put the young Goode through in her life. Having gone through several husbands whom usually made such distasteful remarks about her daughter, but she was only using them to siphon out their money and souls. Afterwards, she normally resorted to _disposing_ incompetence in which is what she made all of those rich men be rendered to.  
  
Then there was the past child abuse in which case, it involved both physical abuse and...  
  
Fiona had to stop this harrowing train of thinking considering she strongly felt it was deemed highly necessary...to _her_ anyway.  
  
Much to her chagrin, Cordelia barks out while that lingering traumatic fury kept up, "You know what you did to me back when I was younger, Fiona!"  
  
Then she huffs and takes a second to catch her breath again and again, she proceeds to attest, "You molested me when I was a little girl, _Mother Dearest_."  
  
There it was. That cold hard _soulless_ truth.  
  
Fiona's heart stopped beating. She couldn't believe her ears and all the spell bindings in the world to have heard the tainted truth coming from her defensive grow up daughter's mouth.  
  
She felt her heart twist for the worst deep inside of her. Fiona couldn't think of any other way to avoid being dismantled emotionally and mentally by her Cordelia. Or worse suffer that through whatever magic she threw at her mother out of anguish and slight contempt.  
  
It made her feel ugly all over and that wasn't a feeling she was content to submit to. It was dastardly enough to bear with.  
  
The fear of losing her daughter forever from this sudden pandemonium started chipping away the last ounces of good inside of Fiona.  
  
"Delia...sweetie..." she spoke, her voice sounding weak and modest.  
  
God damn it…how she abhorred herself for feeling like this; weak and hopeless before her delirious daughter.  
  
" _NO_!" she heard her belt out in ache and repulsion.  
  
The elderly blonde Supreme became even more overwhelmed by her own vulnerability and this was probably the first time in Lord or the Devil knows how long, she's allowed such a painful truth tear away the very vigour and pride she's wickedly thrived to keep up with. She couldn't comprehend the staggering brittle nerves in her and she guessed now she knew exactly how her only child felt at this moment; fragile and unable to keep her emotions grounded without feeling conflicted deep down.  
  
Cordelia, despite her blindness, visibly sent her mother a number of glares and likely contempt for having been emotionally siphoned (and quite traumatized) by the hauntingly abusive flashback to her past. If anyone, even Fiona herself got an even better look into her face, they'd be able to see the tears of distrust and broken heart that leaked down from those previously sulfuric acid injured eyes.

She had literally _no_ idea how to get away from this shocking revelation now.

But she _tried_ to anyway.

“Honey, if you’re mumbling about all of those _methods_ I have, have had…well put you _through_ , then I--”

The blonde witch snapped at her mother, interrupting her sullenly, “You know all of that was _very_ wrong, Fiona! Why did you do it? Why would you stroke me, and hold me and _slip_ those…” Cordelia felt ashamed to even abide on with her claims and heated questions that she felt a ping of insecurity overrule her too quickly for her own liking.

Fiona sighed and closed her eyes, not being able to look into those, even poorly blinded eyes of the one blood kin she had easily ruined her relationship with. Taking a step back and trying to regain her emotional posture, she hadn’t even realized that she was _cowering_ from her daughter. An awkward drastic _change_ of feelings and nerve twinges that left her feeling remorseful and nearly _despising_ herself for have done such unfathomable things in the past.

She may not have her soul anymore, but she still had a _heart_. Whether it’ll melt that cold, pride and insolent wall of ice Fiona encased it with then show tremendous humility and heartbreak with it, only Cordelia held her _fate_ on her _own_ strings this time around.

Back in those days, she was systematically wasting her life away on cigarettes, rich bourbon, several other fine liquor and even _gambled_ her way to success that she would clasp within her hands. Most of those _times_ , she was totally roasted in her own alcohol spells, it often left her feeling restless and _craving_. Craving to be with someone whom she could spread her _hands_ along, giving them such meaningful, affectionate _touches_ and it was probably due to the unsettling fact that she couldn’t handle having a husband for a longer period of time before _true affection_ found its way to pour all over her heart with a molten slick and dissipate the ice barriers around her heart.

Those _feelings_ obviously lead her to touching her mistreated young daughter in the most _unspeakable_ ways ever.

_She may as well bury my soul and send me straight to Hell where I’ll burn for all the god damned bullshit things I’ve done all my life_. She mused unnervingly.

“Cordelia…darling, I truly, _really_ am--” she attempted to apologize again.

Cordelia kept wincing while the incense was boiling her insides, and the humility didn’t stop escalating all over inside and outside of her, everywhere. How could she have forgotten about these twisted events that occurred back in her youth long ago?

“I, I can’t believe I never brought those horrible nights and early mornings back up since…since you _stopped_. But still, why would you taint me all the more with doing such abuse to me, Fiona? What the Hell is it that I’ve _EVER DONE WRONG TO YOU_?!” she spluttered wildly and brokenheartedly at the elder Supreme.

Fiona didn’t want to allow herself to _break_ from her daughter’s rampant controversy, but she knew that it _would_ do her a lot of good. She simply wasn’t going to let those scathing words be the hammer to pummel the protective shield she kept over her heart confining all of her emotions in one locked phase. Though her daughter’s immense bewilderment on how she quickly forgotten about those incidents did leave the elder witch quite saddened for her only child.

She did however say, “I was not in the… _right_ place back then, Delia.”

Scoffing while rolling her blind eyes, Cordelia attested bitterly, “Yeah, you know? You’re always _never_ in the _right_ place.” She takes in a long deep breath and carries on, “It’s disgusting. No wonder why I feel a sliver away from being reminded of something that I’m obviously _not_.”

Confused and blinking her eyes open at her daughter’s last sentence, the taller woman asks her though with a pinch in her stomach, “What are you _not_ then, sweetheart?”

Walking in a careful, slow but safe way over and around her mother to the same black wicker chair she put her walking cane on, the young witch hissed, “The one who’s been trying not to think about what _will_ become of you much later…your _daughter_.”

_Not my daughter_? _That’s just god damned bloody nonsense, Delia_! _We are family, I’m clearly the one who needs to_ …Fiona couldn’t stop twitching at her daughter’s cold words and knew that they _are_ flesh and blood despite what her daughter thinks and feels right now.

“You _are_ and will always be my little Delia, honey. I cannot begin to express how much this turnabout has--”

The woman waved her hand out and abruptly stopped her mother from trying to escape her ramifications and said to her, “Save it, I don’t want to hear it. I need to, I need some… _fresh_ air…because I can’t stand being around the intoxicating stench of those pack of cigarettes lingering on you…or anything else of _you_ like that aggravating Chanel No 5 doused over you.” She coldly dismissed her mother and felt around the wicker chair for her guiding tool, luckily her fingers found it and she takes it then starts pacing her way out of her bedroom, telekinetically opening the door and before Fiona could rush over to insist her daughter to reconsider, the door magically slammed shut just mere inches from her face.

Now she knew _exactly_ how her daughter felt. Rejected and disregarded.

Fiona was going to have to do her best to earn some modicum of redemption from her grownup daughter. The slam of the bedroom door was just the guilty and deserved bolt that completely _shattered_ those walls around her heart. However it was going to be a rather long ride towards claiming that, but at this rate Fiona nearly felt _hopeless_. _Worthless_.

She could’ve slapped herself for how today’s events transpired. At least that’s what Cordelia’s pretty much given her even if it wasn’t _physical_ it still stung the elderly Supreme nonetheless.

She supposed she _did_ deserve all of this. To _know_ what it _feels_ like being in her daughter’s exact shoes.

Given this, she had hoped deep down she would obtain even a smidgen of forgiveness from her daughter, hopefully _before_ she was resting six feet under, that is.

**_~*END*~_ **


End file.
